Positive
by Lanthiriel25
Summary: Tish hasn't been feeling well and Priestly's getting increasingly worried about his wife. When Tish realises what her bouts of sickness might mean, some less than pleasant memories are brought to the surface. How will Priestly react to her fears and the possibility of a new addition to their family? A Priestly/Tish story, with some Tish flashbacks. (see warnings inside)
1. Chapter 1

Summary: Tish hasn't been feeling well and Priestly's getting increasingly worried about his wife. When Tish realises what her bouts of sickness might mean, some less than pleasant memories are brought to the surface. How will Priestly react to her fears and the possibility of a new addition to their family? A Priestly/Tish story, with some Tish flashbacks. (see warnings inside)

Warnings: Some oblique references to teenage sex (17 years old) and abortion (hypothetical, not actual), mentions of contraceptives and domestic abuse. Some mild swearing. (The warnings mainly apply to chapters 4 and 5.) This sounds very heavy, but nothing is graphic, and despite all these warnings, it was written as a sweet, fluffy, happy fic, I promise!

Disclaimer: Writing belongs to me. Everything else belongs to the writers/producers/makers of Ten Inch Hero. For entertainment purposes only.

AN: This story has been lurking in the back of my head for a while and I finally found the time to get it written. By which I mean, sacrificed sleep to appease the plot bunnies! ;) As I've said before, I love Tish and Priestly as a couple and I love imagining stories of their life together after the film ended. This comes after my 'Now and Forever' and 'Colours of our Hearts' stories, but this fic can easily be read as a stand-alone.

AN2: The story is completely finished, with six chapters in total. I will update weekly, real life permitting. I hope you enjoy reading this story. Reviews are very much appreciated. :)

* * *

**Positive**

_By Lanthiriel25_

Chapter 1

Something was pulling him towards consciousness. He could feel it, tugging at the edges of his awareness; something was telling him that he needed to leave his dreams behind and wake up. Priestly groaned into his pillow in protest, trying his hardest to ignore that annoying sensation which was dragging him further and further towards reality. Snuffling as he shifted, Priestly reached for Tish, expecting his fingers to meet with the sleep-warm skin of his wife, wanting nothing more than to hug her close and drift back into his slumber. But his fingers met nothing but rumpled sheets and cold air. Bemused, Priestly slowly pushed himself up onto his elbow, scrubbing his eyes as he cracked them open, face scrunched up in confusion.

Suddenly he heard what it was that must have been tugging at his instincts; a quiet retching sound coming from the bathroom. Tiredness forgotten, Priestly threw the covers back and hurried through the darkness; not again, he groaned internally. This was the sixth night, well, early morning, that Tish had been woken by rolling nausea, spending the hours following hunched wretchedly over the toilet bowl, emptying her stomach until there was nothing left. Piper had had a stomach bug the week previous; she'd been sick as a dog for 48 hours straight. The sickness had subsided after that but it had taken her a while to build up her strength and get back on her feet. Priestly had hoped the sickness would disappear just as quickly for Tish, but it hadn't and it showed no signs of abating. They'd gotten into an argument, a rather loud one, the day before yesterday, with Priestly begging Tish to go to the doctors, just to be sure, hoping they could give her something which would help. He hated seeing her battle through this. But Tish vehemently refused, adamant she must have caught the virus off Piper and that she just had to ride it out with the help of water and sleep. He really hated his wife's stubborn streak at times.

Quickly making his way to the bathroom on bare feet, Priestly pushed open the ajar door, squinting as the bright light assaulted his vision, his heart breaking slightly at the miserable sight before him. Tish was propped up on the floor, resting her head on her forearms which were folded on the toilet seat, breathing heavily. Sweat beaded on her skin, making her hair cling to her face in clumps. Her sleep clothes were dishevelled, hanging loose and twisted uncomfortably round her body. Her eyes were closed but Priestly could see the dark shadows painting her skin, the sleep loss taking its toll on his wife. Her skin shone pale in the harsh bathroom light.

Priestly fell to his knees beside her, gathering her into his arms. Tish made a soft sound of protest as she was moved, but it was half-hearted at best. Priestly shifted himself into a more comfortable position for the both of them, pulling his 'Don't annoy the crazy person' t-shirt, which Tish had taken to wearing to bed, back onto her shoulder as he did so. He smiled in remembrance of when Tish had stolen it and had crossed out 'crazy' and written on 'sleeping' instead, in retaliation for Priestly's habit of waking her if he couldn't sleep.

"Sorry…" Tish whispered, leaning gratefully into her husband's arms, keeping her eyes closed against her nausea. "Sorry, I woke you."

"Shh," Priestly soothed, brushing her limp, damp hair away from her forehead, pressing a gentle kiss to her temple. "It's fine. I'm glad you did. Being sick on your own's never fun.

"Being sick with someone's not that…much fun either," pointed out Tish, her grip on Priestly tightening somewhat as the room began to spin a little faster. "Still… Sorry. Know you're tired…"

"Don't worry about it; you can make it up to me later."

Tish let out what was probably meant to be an indignant huff, but sounded more like a sigh.

"Not looking…my best right now. You sure you want a piece of this?"

"Mmm, you do look pretty gross at the moment, it's true, but I think I'll keep you" conceded Priestly teasingly, his voice still quiet, soothing, in the early morning stillness. "Besides, you're always gorgeous to me."

"I would…throw up at that comment but…don't think I've got anything left," Tish bantered breathlessly.

Priestly just smiled, resting his cheek on her head, wrapping his arms around her, hoping that it really was over for the night, even as he regretted not being there to help Tish through the worst of it. He could feel her small frame trembling against him, the hot-cold clamminess of her skin. Careful not to jostle her too much, he blindly reached up for a washcloth, wetting it in some warm water in the sink. Wringing it out, feeling the excess warm water trickle through his fingers, Priestly haphazardly folded the wet cloth and pressed it gently against Tish's forehead. Tish moaned at the soothing sensation, her tense muscles relaxing slightly against Priestly's body as he tenderly used the cloth to clean and sooth her face, neck and chest.

Suddenly, however he felt Tish tense up against him before she began to squirm a little. Her breathing started to speed up and become more ragged, her temperature rocketing even as she shivered. Priestly had come to know the warning signs pretty well in the last few nights, quickly supporting Tish as she scrambled once more for the toilet bowl.

Bracing himself behind her, holding her upright, Priestly wound his arm around her hips to keep her steady, keeping his other palm resting against her forehead so she wouldn't accidentally hit her head on the unforgiving porcelain as her body violently convulsed, every muscle straining and spasming. Long, painful minutes passed as Tish heaved again and again, body shaking brutally with the effort, struggling her way through this latest attack, painful, guttural sounds and whimpers being torn from her as her body worked against her. Priestly didn't stop his steady stream of reassurances, stroking his thumb across her hip bone in an effort to give her something else to focus on. He couldn't remember what he said, he just wanted Tish to know that he was there, she wasn't on her own, that it would be over soon.

"This…sucks," Tish panted as she slumped back against him, the onslaught over for the moment, her muscles trembling from fatigue.

"Yeah," Priestly agreed, hating to see his wife in any kind of pain or discomfort; it really did suck. He felt so powerless in the face of it all; he just wished there was more he could do. What he didn't know was just how much he was helping, how much it meant to Tish that he was there, that he cared.

Rinsing out the cloth, Priestly dabbed and cleaned her face once more, reaching out to flush away the mess. Sliding out from behind her, so he could get a good look at her, he settled in front of her, bracketing her with his arms. Priestly frowned; she looked terrible. He needed to get her back to bed and resting.

"You think it's over?" Priestly queried, hoping her body would let her relax for the rest of the night.

Tish nodded woozily, tilting slighting as her head movement caused her to lose her sense of balance.

"Come on. Up you get," he encouraged, gently snaking his arm round Tish's back, carefully, slowly, pulling her up to standing. Tish wavered on her feet, leaning heavily into Priestly's hold. Stretching out an arm, seemingly to steady herself, using both Priestly's body and the wall to guide her, Tish began to slowly make her way back to bed. After three wavering steps however Tish's legs went from under her, nearly a week of practically no food and interrupted sleep catching up with her.

Priestly reacted quickly, not letting her crumple to the ground. Despite the awkward position and the narrow space of the hallway, Priestly managed to get Tish cradled in his arms, one arm hooked under her knees, the other securely wrapped around her back, her head resting against his shoulder. Carefully making his way through the dark, not wanting to further hurt his precious cargo, Priestly eventually reached their bedroom, gently placing Tish down on her side of their bed. Wrapping her up in the covers, he pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"You want a drink? Something to wash your mouth out?"

Tish nodded. "Please."

Letting his fingers linger for a moment on the covers, Priestly hurried to the kitchen to fill a glass with some luke-warm water, since cold water apparently wasn't good for upset stomachs. Quickly padding his way back into the bedroom, careful not to spill a drop, Priestly handed Tish the glass before sliding into bed beside her, propping her up against him and arranging the pillows so she was comfortable.

"Okay?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"Good," Priestly smiled, trying to not show her how worried he was about her. "There's still a few hours til morning. Try to get some rest."

"Mmm," Tish replied, setting the glass on the bedside table before snuggling into her husband's embrace, taking comfort from his warmth and his solid presence.

Priestly knew she rarely fell back asleep after the bouts of sickness, the muscles still spasming and cramping at seemingly random intervals. But it seemed that tonight she was given a reprieve. As Priestly hummed quietly, tenderly stroking her hair, soothing her, calming her, Tish actually fell asleep. Priestly could feel as the tension completely left her, her breathing evening out, and he was glad; she needed to rest.

"Sleep well, sweetheart," he breathed, careful not to wake her, finally letting himself close his eyes and drift off for a while himself before his alarm would force him up to greet the day.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Tish stirred; she could feel a warm shaft of light on her face coming from the not-quite-closed curtains across the room. With a yawn and a stretch, she groaned as she came fully awake. Slumping back down, she lifted a hand to her forehead before scratching away some of the sleep from her eyes. Taking stock of how she felt, she was glad to realise that she felt pretty good; there was no more rolling nausea, she didn't feel dizzy, in fact she felt rather refreshed, rested in a way she hadn't felt for days. Glancing at the clock she understood why, the shining digits telling her she'd slept til midday. Blowing out a breath, she carefully pushed herself into a sitting position, resting against the headboard, thankful that the movement didn't cause another bout of wooziness.

Tish spied a half-size thermos next to her clock, with a small folded note leaning against the dark blue plastic. Priestly. She smiled.

Leaning over for the little scrap of paper, Tish quickly read the words, feeling a smile pulling at her mouth.

_Tish, I didn't want to wake you. You need your beauty sleep ;) I've called you in sick to work so don't worry about anything. Truck couldn't manage without both of us since Piper's still not back full time yet so I had to go in, but I finish around lunchtime. I should be back about 2. I've made you some ginger tea and left you some crackers in case you're hungry – hope the tea's still warm enough and that it helps. Text me if you need anything. Feel better and I'll see you later, sleeping beauty xx_

Feeling like a bubble had just swelled in her chest, marvelling in awe at the simple care and love Priestly showed her in every little thing, she carefully folded the note, laying it on the covers in her lap before reaching out and snagging the tea. Unscrewing the lid, Tish simply sat and inhaled the sweet scent, closing her eyes and enjoying the aroma of the warm steam rising out of the flask. She gingerly took a sip; it was a little on the cool side, but it still tasted delicious, and when her stomach seemed to accept it just fine, Tish continued to enjoy her drink. Reading the note again, Tish nibbled on the crackers, happy to also find they went down well; in fact she was starting to feel hungry, something she hadn't felt for a while. Clearly the long, uninterrupted sleep had done her some good, she mused happily.

Needing to use the bathroom, Tish reluctantly left her cosy cocoon, still feeling a little unsteady on her feet, but once again glad that she didn't feel like the room was spinning. Having made her way back to the bedroom, she quickly changed out of her still slightly damp sleep-shirt, pulling on a pair of sweats, some thick fluffy socks and a camisole. Feeling slightly more human now she was properly washed, dressed, albeit in her lazy clothes, having also had a quick comb through of her hair, she snagged her phone from the table before settling herself back into bed. Staring at the phone, fingers tapping on the plastic, she thought about Priestly.

She knew he would be worried about her, his mind only half on the job as he chopped and diced and toasted his way through the morning. She also knew he'd have kept his phone on him, no doubt stuffed into his apron pocket, in case she needed him. He was too good to her, she mused absently, as she began to type her message, wanting to let him know she was awake and feeling ok, and to thank him for the snack he'd left her. She was unaware of the fond smile which curved on her face as her fingers flew over the keys.

* * *

Priestly jumped as his text alert went off, the small phone vibrating quietly from his pocket. Quickly finishing the tofurky sub, he threw a quick salad garnish onto the side of the plate, and took it to the customer sitting in the booth in the far corner. Returning the customer's smile of thanks, Priestly fished out his phone, calling to Trucker that he was taking his break as he hurried into the back room for some privacy, hoping that Tish was alright.

Eyes quickly scanning her message, he let out a small sigh of relief, happy that Tish had managed to sleep through and that she was feeling brighter. Scratching his free hand absently across the back of neck, he quickly shot off a reply, complete with a joke of the day.

Priestly looked up as Trucker joined him in the small break area, drying his hands on a faded blue towel.

"Tish?" he asked with a knowing smile.

Priestly blushed, ducking his head, knowing he was acting like a love-sick teenager. "Yeah."

"How is she?" the older man queried as he lent against the pantry-style shelves, worried about his girls.

"Doing better, I think," Priestly smiled, the relief clear on his face.

Trucker clapped him on the shoulder, squeezing slightly, knowing just how much Priestly had been worrying, the lines of anxiety and exhaustion clear on his face.

"That's great news," Trucker smiled in return.

The bell tinkled from the main grill, signalling another customer. Trucker turned back, disappearing into the grill; Priestly lingered for a moment, gaze hovering over his phone screen, mentally counting down the minutes until he could go home and see how Tish was doing with his own eyes.

Trucker's cheerful call of "Oy! Priestly! Some time today!" pulled him from his thoughts. He hurriedly stuffed his cell away and got back to work.

"A hero's work is never done!" retorted Priestly with a cheeky grin as he took up his customary place by the grill plates, causing Trucker to roll in eyes in fond exasperation.

* * *

Reading Priestly's text, Tish jumped as her alert rang off again. Thinking Priestly had sent the message twice by accident, she finished reading the text and sent off her reply. Having closed the message however she realised that the second text was actually from Jen. Picking up the last cracker to chew on absently, Tish opened it and began to read.

_Hey, how are you doing? I'm on afternoon shift. You in later? Found that book you were asking about. You want me to bring it to work? Or I could drop it round your place? X_

Shoving the rest of the cracker into her mouth so she had two hands free, Tish settled herself back into the pillows, sending her reply.

_Thanks. But I was sick again this morning. Truck's given me the day off. I'll get it from you if I'm in tomorrow if that's ok? X_

Jen's reply came through not a moment later, Tish marvelling over the speed of Jen's typing.

_That's fine. Oh no - feel better! Morning sickness? For what? 6 days? You're not pregnant, are you? Am I going to be Auntie Jen? Haha! ;) I can give Priestly some ginger snaps for you, if you'd like – our shifts overlap. Piper said they helped x_

Tish froze, staring at her phone. All the words were a blur, all except a few. She knew Jen was joking, but her brain couldn't help but snag on the idea. She read the message again and again, as if that would change its meaning, until it timed out and the screen went dark. She could still see the words imprinted on her brain though – morning sickness. Pregnant. Pregnant? She couldn't be though, could she? Sure, she'd been throwing up but it hadn't even crossed her mind. She was on the pill; she hadn't missed any, or at least she didn't think she had… Could she be pregnant? Could…?

She scrubbed a hand over her face, trying to focus, think rationally. She chewed her lip as she thought through everything; admittedly, she was late, but she'd put it down to being so tired and run down with the apparent sickness bug. But maybe…maybe she was late for another reason entirely…

Tish felt her stomach swoop, as if the floor had suddenly been pulled from under her. She couldn't believe it. But everything was starting to make some kind of sense, why the sickness didn't last all day, why usually by the afternoon, evening, she felt pretty much normal before the next wave began in the early hours, why she was late. Tish dragged a hand through her hair, brain flying a mile a minute as her mind threw up a million what ifs, dredging up some unpleasant memories in the process. No, she told herself firmly. She didn't want to think about that. But she couldn't help but think about Priestly's reaction to the whole thing. Would he be pleased, excited? Or would he be upset, angry at her for letting something like this happen? They'd spoken about having children; they both wanted to be parents someday but they'd agreed that they wouldn't start to try until a few years down the line. Would he be upset that this had happened sooner? What would they do?

Tish bit her lip, hands twisting unconsciously in her lap. Would he leave her? No; Tish threw out that idea as soon as it formed. Priestly would never do that; he'd support her, be there for both her and the baby, no matter he own personal feelings about the whole thing. But that's what made Tish heart clench in her chest – she didn't what to ruin what they had, Priestly only by her side out of his sense of honour and duty, not because he truly loved her or the baby. Tish felt herself getting more and more agitated, the horrible images not leaving her alone.

Tish jumped as her phone sounded once more. She fumbled for it, finding a message from Priestly.

_I've clocked off. See you soon, lazy pants xx_

Priestly was on his way home! Tish didn't know what to do; she'd barely come to terms with the idea for herself, let alone having to tell Priestly. But despite this, the thought of her husband being by her side soon enough, calmed her frazzled nerves slightly. This could be the most incredible thing to have happened to them. A child – a mini combination of them both. Images played across her head, like a video-reel, of them both looking after their little one: a little girl maybe, smiling a tooth-less smile, freckles decorating her nose and cheeks just like her husband's; or perhaps a little boy, blowing raspberries, his chestnut hair sticking up in every direction, wide, green eyes marvelling at the world. Her and Priestly showing off their child to their friends, all the grill family cooing over the baby, showering the little one with attention and love. Tish felt she could burst from the wave of emotion which was crashing through her as the thought. Their future. Maybe.

Maybe this wouldn't be a bad thing; maybe this would be the best thing ever for their little family. She could only hope that Priestly would feel the same when she dropped the metaphorical bomb-shell. Tugging the blanket off the bed, Tish padded her way to the living room, getting herself cosy on the sofa as she mentally prepared what she would say to Priestly when he got home, trying and failing to ignore her swirling, joyful-terrified, excited-confused emotions as she did so. She desperately hoped Priestly would be happy at the news, her anxiety simmering away under the surface in case he didn't feel so positively about it all. She shifted in agitation, wishing away the minutes until her husband returned.

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Next chapter coming soon...


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"Priestly, I… What happened to you?!" she exclaimed, her prepared speech momentarily forgotten as she was faced with her husband in the doorway and his crazier than usual hair.

"Huh?" Priestly frowned in confusion as he closed the door behind him, glancing down at his clothes in case he'd spilt something down them at the grill without realising.

Following Tish's line of sight to his hair, Priestly remembered.

"Oh, yeah," he smiled, gesturing to his hair, which he'd double hawked that morning. That was nothing unusual, but colouring was; usually his hair was a solid block of colour in this style, today one hawk was a solid blue whilst the other started off green and ended purple.

"I ran out of dye," he explained simply, with a shrug of his shoulders. "You like?"

"Mmm, so so," Tish replied, mind still caught on the fact that the reason why he'd run out of his dye was because he'd been so busy looking after her, putting her first, just like he always did.

"Anyway, how are you feeling?" he questioned, the care clear in his tone, throwing his keys on the table, before making his way over to her. "You're looking a bit better, more colour in your cheeks. Have you been sick again?"

Tish's smiling face at Priestly's hair vanished in an instant, the possibility of her being pregnant crashing down on her again. Priestly started forward, seeing her sudden change in her body language, the way she shrunk in on herself a little, looking nervously around, arm catching her other one.

"I… Priestly… I think… We need to talk."

Tish winced as she saw Priestly's expression fall, a confused and anxious frown forming on his face, his attempt at cheering her up, that small, cajoling smile, long gone. She watched the panic and worry flitting across his face as he wracked his brains as to what could have brought on that ominous-sounding statement. Scenarios, each more horrible than the last, flashed through his mind. Had she gone to the doctors without him? Was she seriously ill? What…? With an effort he forced his worries down, telling himself not to get ahead of himself and just listen to what Tish had to say.

"Okay," Priestly agreed, somewhat nervously, coming over to join her on the sofa, turning more to face her so she had his full attention.

Tish did the same, twisting on her cushion so she was sitting cross-legged facing her husband, hands clenched and shaking in her lap. She couldn't hold her husband's open yet concerned gaze. She could see his love for her shining ever-present in their depths, and she couldn't bear the thought of seeing that light go out. No, Tish scolded herself, it wouldn't be like that. She tried to focus on the flicker of hope and untempered joy which burned inside of her, her happiness at the mere thought of having a baby with her beloved husband. Tish ducked her head, instead keeping her gaze focused on her hands, taking a steadying breath and trying to figure out how to say what she needed to.

Suddenly, a tender hand reached out, fingers resting under her chin, and she was gently guided into looking at Priestly once again. She felt his other hand envelope hers in her lap. Without conscious thought, she latched onto him, trapped his hand between hers, interlacing their fingers together, taking the silent support her husband offered.

"Hey," Priestly encouraged softly, pushing away his fear in the face of his wife's apparent anxiety, "it's okay. Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know that. We can work through it, together. Just tell me; I'm not going anywhere, I promise."

Hearing those words, spoken with such love and compassion, made Tish's pounding heart soar. She could do this; everything was going to be ok, she coached herself. She drank in her sight of Priestly, his soul-deep eyes, his freckles, his obnoxiously coloured and spiked hair, his piercings glinting in the light, his tattoo peeking over the collar of his t-shirt, everything that she loved about him, his humour, his smile, his heart. Taking strength from the support Priestly was offering her, his words and his promises, clutching tight to the trust she had in him, she steeled herself, thinking where would be best to begin.

"I… I think you were right."

Priestly let out a short chuckle.

"Now I'm really worried; you never admit I'm right!" Priestly teased, trying to ease the tension. "Even though I always am," he added for good measure, complete with sulky pout.

Tish couldn't help but smile, conceding the point, knowing how unusual her admission was.

"I think… I don't think I've got the bug Piper had. It's been going on too long and Piper didn't have afternoons off, when she felt okay. And… Priestly, I'm late. I thought maybe it was just because I was sick but now I think…"

Tish stopped and took a deep breath, glancing up at Priestly's unwavering, earnest gaze.

"I think I might be pregnant," she managed to explain.

Priestly's eyes snapped to hers, lips parting in shock, not quite believing what he was hearing; it made no sense. Tish could see the exact moment her words registered, seeing Priestly's eyes widen slightly as he looked at her, whole body freezing in would-be shock. Pregnant? His mind screamed at him. Tish was pregnant?! They were going to have a baby? He couldn't believe it; it was…

"I don't… Pregnant?" he whispered, completely blind-sided by this revelation. "How…? How is that possible? I thought you were on the pill?"

"I am!" Tish hastened to confirm, a distant, familiar panic beginning to claw its way up her throat; Priestly must know that she wouldn't betray or deceive him like that. "I don't know… Maybe I missed one or…? I swear I haven't stopped taking them, I promise!"

Priestly frowned. Tish should never sound this scared or panicked. Tish was always so confident, so sure, never afraid to stand up for herself and fight her corner. This timid, apologetic Tish, who was so close to tears in front of him, practically begging him to forgive her for something which was a cause to celebrate not fear, was so far from the self-assured, out-going girl he fell for. Something had happened to her, he realised; something must have happened in the past that would make her react this way. Someone had hurt her. Priestly's blood boiled, his fists clenching in absolute fury at the person who had caused Tish to fear this kind of news in this way, fear that she was at fault and that he would hate her for it. Whoever this guy was Priestly was going to find and rip him apart.

"No, no, no," Priestly reassured forcefully, startled at Tish's frantic, almost pleading assurances. He hadn't meant to imply anything by his words, he trusted Tish with his life; he was just so stunned. He pushed down his anger at whoever had hurt her, focusing on his precious wife.

He reached out to cup her cheek, hoping to calm her with the familiar gesture. "I believe you! It's just…" He let out a soft breath, a bright, incredulous smile forming his face. "Wow! I… A baby? Seriously? That's… That's awesome! I mean," he faltered, seeing Tish's seemingly muted reaction, "It _is_ awesome, right?"

Tish hesitiated before her face broke into a wide grin as she let the tiny flame of elation inside her kindle and grow, relieved that Priestly wasn't upset with her whilst being confronted with Priestly's utterly perfect joy at the news.

"Yeah," she admitted, voice quiet yet brimming with emotion, thinking how lucky she was to have a husband like Priestly, that she got to share this with him. "Yeah, I kinda think it is." She paused, letting everything wash over her. "We might be having a baby, Priestly!"

Priestly pulled her up off the sofa, wrapping her against him, kissing her soundly. Returning the kiss for several moments, Tish eventually pulled back for air.

"Well, best find out then, hadn't we?" Priestly murmured, his breath tickling her face, before he left a delicate kiss on the tip of her nose. Standing back, holding out his hand, he continued with a cheeky grin. "I think we've got some shopping to do."

* * *

Despite Tish's protests that she felt okay, Priestly still bundled her up before grasping her hand tightly, the pair of them making their way to the local pharmacy to purchase a pregnancy test. Not having been outside for a while, especially not having walked any great distance, Tish felt a little unsure on her feet, but Priestly kept her close, keeping his pace fairly slow, belying his desire to get there as soon as possible. She was glad Priestly hadn't tried to stop her from going with him to the store; she wanted this moment, to do this, by her husband's side, every step of the way.

Tish giggled quietly to herself as she noticed the beaming smile shining on Priestly's face, his almost child-like excitement palpable, despite his attempts to disguise it.

Her nerves came back in full force however when they reached the store and collected what they needed. She felt a twist of nausea in her gut when the elderly check-out clerk, taking in their nervous, smiling faces, the way they couldn't keep their eyes off each other, and wished them "Good Luck".

* * *

The walk back to their apartment was a blur. Tish suddenly found herself outside their bathroom, pink box resting in her fingers, Priestly's comforting presence beside her.

"I'll be right here," Priestly encouraged, stopping in the hallway outside the door, wanting to give Tish a little bit of privacy. Seeing Tish's hesitance he rested a gentle hand on her lower back, guiding her kindly into the bathroom.

Tish smiled somewhat shakily back at him, box clutched in her fist. Entering the bathroom, Tish turned to glance once more at her wonderful husband, drawing from his calm and strength.

Inside Priestly was anything but calm, his every instinct screaming him to be shaking, cheering, jumping up and down, pacing, but he reined it all in, sensing that Tish needed him to keep his cool for the moment.

Priestly saluted her, smiling as Tish returned the gesture, mouth twitching, trying to control the hope and anticipation bursting through her.

"I'll be out in a minute," Tish assured as she lowered her hand, gaze lingering on his face for a moment before she closed the door.

Returning her smile, Priestly watched as Tish disappeared behind the door, hearing the snick of the catch but not the lock. Taking a deep, cleansing breath, Priestly tried to still the tremor in his fingers. Tipping his head back onto the wall, staring at the slightly peeling ceiling of the hallway, Priestly tried to calm his racing heart. Could this be really happening? Was he dreaming? It felt like a dream; a wonderful possibility that felt far too good to be true.

Leaning against the plaster, Priestly waited, listening carefully to Tish's movements as she shuffled around the small bathroom, hearing the bath creak as she no doubt perched herself on the edge.

* * *

Next chapter coming soon... :)


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Sitting on the bath edge, Tish shivered in excited anticipation. An awful sense of déjà vu washed over her however, momentarily eclipsing her joy; memories of the times she found herself in this position before clamouring for attention. How similar they were, and yet how so incredibly different. She took comfort from the fact that Priestly was mere feet away, supporting her and loving her. It was so different to how she'd experienced this in the past. She didn't like to think on those times much, much preferring to focus on her happy present, but the similarity of where she found herself brought forward some memories she hadn't dwelt on for a long time, memories where she'd found herself sitting on a bath's edge twice before, a familiar box resting in her fingers...

* * *

A seventeen year old Tish ran into the house, practically slamming the door behind her. Since it was mid-afternoon she knew the house would be empty, her parents at work. A quick "Mom? Dad? Anyone home?" reassured her that she wasn't going to be interrupted. Swallowing back a sob as her panic threatened to choke her, Tish tore open her school backpack, near breaking the zip in her haste. Pulling out the now-crushed box from the front pocket, her face still burned from the embarrassment and shame at the drugs store, stumbling over her words as she'd paid for the test.

She'd been in Biology class, daydreaming as the teacher droned on and on about human conception and gestation, the trimesters of development for a growing foetus. She'd been twiddling a pencil between her manicured fingers, thinking on what her Aunt Janey might cook for their dinner that night. She hoped it wasn't her famous tuna-pasta bake. Normally it was Tish's favourite dish, loving the rich tomato mixed in with the creamy sauce and tuna pieces, topped off with melted cheese which just started to crisp up in the oven, but when Aunt Janey had cooked it for her last weekend she'd barely made it to the kitchen sink before she'd thrown up. Tish scrunched up her nose as her mind brought forth the memory of the heavy, spicy aroma of the meal, her stomach beginning to churn as the imaginary smell invaded her nostrils. She practically dived off her stool, dropping her pencil with a clatter as she grabbed her back pack from under the workbench. Ignoring the shouts of her teacher she sprinted her way to the nearest bathroom. She fell to her knees in the closest cubicle and emptied her breakfast into the bowl. Gasping for air she fell back onto the floor, leaning awkwardly against the tiles until her breathing slowed and her stomach settled.

The words of her teacher echoed round her brain, warning signs of pregnancy, symptoms, time frames. And suddenly everything began to horribly align. She closed her eyes, breathing through her nose as nausea threatened her again, as she began to realise what all this might mean. Trying not to panic, she counted back the days to Jayden's party, the night she'd finally told her boyfriend, Tom, that she was ready. She smiled at the memory; it had been awkward, painful, but it had been special. As much as her barely seventeen year old mind could understand, she loved him, thought they were forever, and she'd been happy to solidify their relationship.

But now that she really thought about it, they hadn't been careful, and now she was throwing up at even the thought of the smell of cooking tuna. It might mean nothing, but her fearful mind had latched onto the horrifying possibility and it wouldn't let it go.

She could see it now. Her parents yelling and screaming at her, kicking her out, her aunt's disappointed face, the jeers and taunts from her classmates. She didn't sleep around; it wasn't something she'd decidedly lightly, she loved Tom after all, but she could just hear the shouts of 'Whore!', 'Slut!' 'Skank!' echoing off the lockers as she fought her way through the throngs of teenagers. Tish pressed her hands over her ears as if to block out their cries. Her eyes snapped open at her next thought however. Tom would stand by her though. Wouldn't he?

Would he though? Her treacherous mind questioned. He was on the fast track to stardom; he could have his pick of any college he wanted. Would he really throw that all away for her? She wanted to believe the answer was yes, but her rational mind simply scoffed at the thought. Needing to know whether she was panicking for nothing, one way or another, Tish did what she had never done before, walking out of school in the middle of the morning, lessons be damned. She hurried to the nearest pharmacy, picked the first test she'd laid her eyes on and hastened home.

Box in hand, Tish ran up the stairs, taking two at a time, before locking herself in the bathroom. Through terrified eyes, she read and re-read the tiny print of the instructions, trying to block out the horrible pictures crowding her mind. Her dad screaming and yelling at her, how she brought shame to him and her mom. Her mom crying as her dad shouted himself hoarse. Them slamming the door behind her with nothing but the clothes on her back, afraid and alone.

She pushed herself into the corner, between the cabinet and the shower stall, pulling her knees up to her chin, wrapping her arms around her shins, as if she could make herself as small as possible, that she could keep everything away. She felt so scared and so alone, the numbing tile making her body shiver both with the cold as well as her terror. Please, please, please, she begged. She couldn't do this. She couldn't bear her family, her boyfriend, her friends, the whole town, all turning from her.

The test had been negative. Her aunt had found her that evening, curled up on the floor of the bathroom, face flushed and tear-stained, having cried herself to sleep in her relieved, nervous exhaustion. Janey never found the test Tish had stashed in her inner pocket, which she'd then disposed of in a public trash can on her way to school the following day. No-one had been any the wiser. Tish had never known that her parents would have been angry but would ultimately have supported her in whatever she decided to do next, that her aunt would have scolded her for being so careless but wrapped her in her arms, telling her that she'd help her however she needed, that Tom would have taken a gap year to stay with her. As it was, life had carried on as normal, except Tish felt further away from everyone now, Tom included. He felt she was being distant, secretive, and Tish didn't feel like she could share her secret, so they parted ways. There wasn't shouting or tears, it was as friendly as it could have been, but Tish just felt numb to it all.

* * *

As unpleasant as the memory was, the lingering bitter taste of the absolute panic turning to empty numbness, Tish could recall that time with minimal emotion. She'd been young, everything had felt like the be all and end all; it wasn't too hard remember Tom or her school years anymore. The second time she'd needed to make a trip to the lonely pharmacy however, still caused that sickening prickle of fear and anger to skate up her spine…


	5. Chapter 5

Please heed the story warnings in the author notes in Chapter 1. This chapter contains scenes of domestic abuse, mentions of abortion and some language.

* * *

Chapter 5

"What's this?" Connor demanded, thrusting the thin pink box into Tish's face, his face hard and cold. Tish looked up from her task of snapping the cap off the cold, brown bottle. She felt her stomach clench as she saw what Connor held; she hadn't meant for him to see that. She knew how her college-boyfriend, Connor, would react to such a thing; she'd meant to stash it away as soon as she'd gotten back, but he had wanted a beer so she'd gone to fetch a chilled bottle from the fridge. Connor had obviously taken it upon himself to search through the bags, Tish's bags.

Tish took a deep breath, replacing the bottle opener onto the smooth counter top with a quiet clang, tucking her hair behind her ear with a shaking hand. No way out of this now, she thought ruefully.

"It's.. It's a pregnancy test," she clarified, desperately wanting to snatch it from his fingers and run and hide.

"Yes," Connor replied, voice deathly cold, "I can see that. What I want to know is why do you have one?"

"Because…" Tish faltered, knowing the answer was blatantly obvious but Connor just wanted to humiliate her. She fought the weak urge to answer his power-games with cutting sarcasm, but self-preservation won out, as it always did. "Because…I'm late and I… Because…"

She licked her lips, her throat suddenly dry, hating that someone could make her feel this way, but not really knowing she had any way out.

"Because you're a filthy, cheating whore who can't keep her legs together, and you've got yourself knocked up behind my back?"

Tish frantically shook her head, denying his hateful words. She gripped onto the kitchen island tightly, trying to centre herself, grateful that the island was between her and Connor.

"No!" she denied. "No, I would never… If… If I am pregnant, it's yours. It's yours."

"How can I believe anything that comes out of that lying mouth?"

Tish gulped, taking an instinctive step back, as Connor slowly, deliberately stalked around the island.

"A body like yours, who wouldn't want a go on that? Bet you've been laughing at me behind my back with the whole football team? The whole campus? Huh?"

Connor was crowding Tish now, her back firmly pressed up against the fridge with nowhere to go.

"Connor..." she pleaded, fear coursing through her. "I promise. It's yours. I've never… It's yours. I love you."

The last words were whispered, helplessly, from terrified lips.

Heavy silence lingered for a couple of moments, causing Tish to peer up from under her eyelashes to gauge Connor's reaction. She quickly darted her gaze away as his expression darkened.

"Oh, I get it… You scheming, manipulative bitch! You think by getting pregnant that you can keep me, is that it? You're scared I'm gonna leave you, so you, what? Flush your pills away? Make sure you get knocked up to try and make me stay with you?"

"No! I promise… I swear I didn't…"

Tish's words were cut off in fright as Connor slammed his palm into the fridge, inches from Tish's face. Seeing her startled reaction, Connor smiled, slowly. Letting himself relax, he gently guided Tish's face so she was looking at him, the fear sparkling in their brown depths.

"Babe. You don't own me," he explained carefully, his voice hard and jagged, eyes boring into hers. His thumb smoothed possessively down her neck, an awful parody of real affection. "Your plan won't work. A baby changes nothing; they're easily gotten rid of. One afternoon, couple of hundred dollars. Gone. Over."

"No," Tish gasped at the insinuation. She wouldn't let him hurt her baby. She wouldn't! She struggled against his hold, eyes flashing a dull fire, trying to pull away, feeling his bruising hold simply tighten painfully. He could hurt her, but never their child.

"No?" Connor slammed her back against the fridge, pressing his forearm across her throat and pushing down. Tish's hands scrambled for purchase in his sleeve, trying to pull the heavy limb away but it was no use. She wasn't weak, not by any stretch of the imagination, but he was just so much bigger, so much stronger.

Tish closed her eyes, as he leant closer, his breath sticky and hot against her face, tears silently leaking out the corner of her eyes as she struggled for air.

"You won't have a choice. And I'm not letting you screw me over and ruin my life. If that test is positive, we get rid of that baby, get back to normal and you try your damnedest not to embarrass me at every turn. I love you, babe, but then you go and do something like this? That hurts me. You never know, I might forgive you for trying to manipulate me like this," he leant in, kissing her bruisingly on the mouth. "But then again…I might not."

Tish shrunk back as much as she could into the unforgiving coldness of the plastic and metal behind her.

Twisting his grip harshly in her shirt he hauled her across the kitchen, shoving the pregnancy test box into her sweating palms, before dragging her down the hallway and practically throwing her into the bathroom. Dropping the box, Tish managed to catch herself on the sink, instead of tumbling head first into the shower-bath.

"Scheming whore," he snorted derisively as he watched her try to get her feet under herself and straighten up before turning and storming out the room, slamming the door behind him.

Not waiting even a second, Tish launched herself across the small bathroom, throwing the lock across, feeling marginally safer at having even that flimsy barrier between them.

"Dick," she mumbled to herself, letting out a shaking breath, running a hand across her throat as she aimed a half-hearted kick to the door, impotent anger coursing through her, warring with the fear that threatened to engulf her. The anger soon bled away however as the adrenaline left her and she was left alone in the cold bathroom, with her judgement about to be handed to her on a platter.

She'd loved him once, fully and truly, without any trace of hesitance or fear. He'd been nice, charming, and he'd chosen her, treating her to lavish dinners and expensive gifts, as much as a college student could afford at any rate. She'd been well and truly swept off her feet with his fancy words and high promises. He'd been attentive, kind, and the change had been so gradual that she'd hardly noticed it. She still remembered how he'd been in the start, he was still in there somewhere, she was sure of it; he was just stressed about college work, he wouldn't have to be so harsh if she'd just get her act together and not keep saying or doing the wrong thing. Tish sighed to herself; how had it come to this? How had she gotten here? How had she let herself get here? Shaking her head to clear the depressing thoughts she glanced around the floor for the box that had started today's nightmare. Spying where the package had spun into the corner, she stooped to pick it up and made her way over to the bath.

Tish shakily lowered herself so she was perched on the bath edge, whole body trembling. She clutched the box in her hands, feeling the dread coursing through her. This couldn't be happening; it just couldn't. She didn't know what she would do, if it was true, if she really was pregnant. She hoped and prayed with everything she had that what she feared never came to pass. Her breath was catching in her chest, her throat dry. She swallowed, running her tongue across her bottom lip, nerves ratcheting higher and higher every second. She wasn't sure how long she had sat there, but she knew she had to move soon. With shaking fingers she opened the small box, taking a deep breath to calm herself as she tried to steady her hands so she could read the small print on the underside of the package. Closing her eyes, holding her breath in her lungs for a moment before slowly letting the air out, she steeled herself and followed the instructions on the box.

Procedure complete she carefully placed the plastic stick on the porcelain of the sink. Gripping the edge of the sink with both hands, she bowed her head. Two minutes; two minutes to wait. What was she going to do? She didn't want this baby. She felt bad just thinking it, but she couldn't. She did want children, someday. But not now, not with him. She couldn't bring a child into this life, a precious, tiny person, who relied on her, needed her to keep them safe; and she knew she couldn't do that, she couldn't really even keep herself safe. It wasn't abuse, nothing like that. But he wasn't kind; he was harsh and forceful. He scared her sometimes… Alright, quite a lot of the time. But he chose her, she was wanted, she was loved.

Her gaze locked onto the red smudge across her neck, the older, angry, purple-blue bruises around her wrist where he'd grabbed her the night before last, the finger prints around her upper arms visible in her tank top from where he'd gripped her and shaken her in a fit of anger. She hadn't meant to upset him; they'd been out to meet some of his friends…

He always liked showing her off to his mates, the prettiest girl in college. She smiled and laughed in all the right places, talking him up. His friends were shallow assholes, she mused, more often than not spending their time leering at her and groping at her when they got the chance. She'd gotten quite good at brushing them off however without angering them. She put all her skills to good use and managed to extract herself from the crowd, having spotted Imran by the drinks table and wanting to catch up with him and talk to someone who treated her like a person. They were having a nice conversation but it had all come tumbling down very quickly however when Connor had spotted her, just as she'd reached out and touched Imran on the arm, laughing with him at the story he was sharing. It had been meant innocently enough; she was merely asking after Imran's younger sister, who she'd met at the New Year party and who hoped to get a scholarship to their college for her cheerleading. Tish had enjoyed cheering when she'd been in high school and had been glad to offer her advice and laugh about her cheering escapades with both Yani and her brother. Imran had been regaling her with the story of when Yani had blackmailed him into trying some moves of his own, complete with poms poms, which she'd caught on camera and blown up bigger than life size to embarrass him with at his birthday party.

Connor, already tipsy, had marched over, dragging her away from her friend with a thunderous expression and angry words. How dare she humiliate him like that? Shamelessly flirting with any guy she sees? Whoring herself out to the whole campus when his back's turned? You may be pretty, but you're lucky I put up with you! Tish remembered the rising fury at his words; she wasn't going to let him speak to her like that, treat her this way! It was getting out of hand, and more than she could simply brush off. But his sudden change in demeanour, his scarily contrite, "I'm sorry, babe. I just get so jealous. It's only because I love you, you know" doused the fire. He looked so remorseful, so she swallowed down her indignation and accepted his apology quietly, not waiting cause a fuss and make a scene. She didn't like his envious outbursts but he loved her, that meant she was wanted, right? The lingering fear of being left alone, of not being good enough, clever enough, for anyone else to want her, haunted her more than she realised.

She jumped as Connor's harsh voice echoed through the apartment, the wooden door shaking in its frame as he banged on the other side.

"Hurry up! You done it yet?"

"Just…" Tish faltered, wishing her throat wasn't so dry. "Just waiting for the result. Another minute or so!" Tish forced out.

Quickly running the faucet, cupping her hands underneath it, she awkwardly drank down some water to ease her throat. Shaking the worst of the moisture off her hands, Tish stared at the stick, spinning it with her finger so it was the right way up, willing the result to appear, even as she wished she'd never know. She hoped and prayed it would be negative.

"Please," she whispered to no-one in particular, wishing there was someone to hear her prayer.

What would she do if it were positive? Connor would never let her keep it. He'd drive to her the clinic and strap her to the table himself to make sure she went through with it, she was sure of it. But could she do it? It wasn't the baby's fault its father was an asshole and its mother was afraid and a coward, unable to protect it. She wasn't sure she could do that, kill her unborn child, no matter what Connor threatened or did. Glancing in the mirror she realised she'd subconsciously, instinctively, pressed both her palms against her stomach, cradling it almost, as if protecting her child. She imagined the little life perhaps beginning under her fingers. Clearly her subconscious had decided for her. She couldn't ever see herself being able to go through with it. She let out a half sob. But she neither could she see herself bringing a baby into this life she led with Connor. It was cruel and it was hard. He had his moments where he made her feel like the prettiest, most treasured girl on the planet, but they were getting fewer and farther between. He was unpredictable and moody; it was no place for a baby. What would she do?

She could leave him, leave college, go back home. But no, that would never work; her parents would disown her, not that they did much 'owning' as it was. She thought her Aunt Janey would help her, but she worked a minimum wage job to make ends meet for herself and her family, she couldn't impose on them. She had no-one, no friends she was close enough to to ask for help, nowhere to go and no idea what to do. She felt the sickeningly familiar helplessness begin to wash over her, drowning her with its crushing power, but she pushed it away. Now was the time to be strong, to fight back. She was terrified and she knew it would hurt; despite everything she still loved him, and the fear that felt like it was slicing her apart, that no-one would ever want her, that she wouldn't ever be good enough, just a pretty face and a hot body, nothing more, threatened to paralyse her.

She could hear Connor's and his friends words, their taunts, about how an easy lay was all she was good for, talking about her as if she wasn't standing right there. She remembered the nights after Connor had fallen asleep that she'd spent awake bitterly thinking of her childhood dreams of her own happily ever after, wondering why no-one saw her underneath it all. Whilst she knew she wasn't the cleverest girl on campus, she thought she had a good head on her shoulders, she was loyal, she was funny, but clearly who she was just wasn't someone that people wanted to get to know and spend time with. Maybe no-one would ever want her again, except to have some 'fun' with.

She clenched her jaw, running her hand over her mid-section. So be it. She could be that girl, and more fool them. She wouldn't get her heart broken again; she could build up walls so high that no-one could get in. She could take what she needed, use them like they did her, see how they liked it, and damn the pain in her heart at never having a chance at the family she'd dreamed of. She might be afraid and a coward, but she could do this, baby or no baby. She would keep her child safe from Connor and from the world, and if there was no child, well, she was leaving anyway. She couldn't stay; she didn't care where she went, just pick a town, find a cheap place and a job. Who needed friends, who needs family, who needed someone to cherish and care for? You do, screamed a scared voice inside her, but she stamped in down.

She startled once more as Connor pounded on the door, internally berating herself for the reflexive reaction.

"Cowering in there isn't going to help you, Tish. Get your cheap ass out here and then we can work on clearing up your mess!"

Staring hard at herself, Tish took a deep, steadying breath, closing her eyes for a moment, trying to calm herself before she reached out for the stick.

Tish looked at the plastic for long moments, barely seeing the tiny symbol, her mind numb, emotions swirling. She was… It said… The test was…

Negative.

The small and innocuous little shape telling her that it was ok, she wasn't pregnant. She didn't have to face bringing a child into a world full of uncertainty and fear. She felt the awful tension leave her, muscles relaxing from their strain. But even as the relief washed through her, she couldn't help but feel a pang of grief, her maternal instincts having been unknowingly awakened, and she felt the loss of something she had never even had. She took another refreshing gulp of air, collecting herself, telling herself it truly was all for the best. It was. And now she had a job to do, to leave her life, so she could start to live. She didn't know what kind of life it would be, but she knew it would almost certainly be a difficult, friendless and loveless one, if her experiences about herself and how people reacted to her were anything to go by. But that was ok. At least it would be her choice.

"Tish!" thundered Connor, his impatience boiling over.

Bracing herself, closing down her heart and throwing up her walls, Tish clutched the stick in a white knuckled grip.

"Ti…!"

Tish threw open the door, throwing the stick at Connor's feet.

"Negative," she spat, pushing past him and into the bedroom, making quick work of pulling her hold-all from the bottom of the wardrobe and filling it with everything she thought she'd need, anything that she owned that had any sentimental value. She forced herself not to look at the photos scattered around the room, hers and Connor's smiling faces beaming mockingly at her. They did have some good times, and now she was leaving. She wavered at the thought.

By the time Tish had almost filled her bag, Connor seemed to have accepted the turn of events and was now anxious to know what Tish was doing. Quickly taking in the scene, Connor practically snarled and tore the bag from Tish's grip, tipping it up in an attempt to undo Tish's packing.

Tish was too quick for him however, ducking his attempted back hand as she wrestled the bag from him, shoving him backwards. She fumbled to stuff back in the items which Connor had emptied out, zipping up the fabric and shouldering it.

Pushing himself up from the ground, Connor grabbed her arm, crushing fingers digging in over old bruises, hauling Tish around, causing her to gasp.

"How dare you?!" Connor challenged.

"How dare I?!" Tish asked incredulously. "I'm done. We're done!"

"You don't get to choose…!"

"Choose what I do with my life?" interrupted Tish, righteous fury giving her the courage to stand up and fight. "Yes, Connor. Yes, I do. And you are no longer a part of it!"

With that, Tish wrenched her arm out of Connor's grasp, and marched through their rooms and out the door.

She could hear Connor's footsteps following her, stopping in the front doorway.

"You leave and you're throwing away the best thing you'll ever have. No-one else will have you, Tish! Not ever! You're nothing but a worthless whore!" he yelled spitefully, his voice full of mockery and venom.

Part of Tish quailed at this pronouncement, fearing its truth almost more than she feared staying. She hesitated for a moment, indecision borne of fear warring within her, but eventually she met Connor's hard gaze.

"Maybe," she admitted quietly, before her voice gained strength. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not someone who people want to know or will ever really care about; maybe I will be alone. But I owe it to myself to try. Goodbye, Connor."

Turning decisively on her heel, trying her hardest not to let herself waver, Tish ignored Connor's angry cries. She wasn't sure who she was trying to convince, herself or Connor, but she fought hard not to dwell on her crumbled and smashed self-esteem. She made it to the train station before she let the enormity of what she'd done crash down on her. Everything she'd left behind and thrown away. The big, terrifying unknown laid out in front of her. She slumped back against the brick, sliding down the rough wall until she was sitting in the dust, hold-all resting at her feet. Tish had no idea how long she sat there, her world shattered in pieces around her. Minutes or maybe hours later, Tish dug her wallet out of the side pocket of her bag, and paid for the cheapest ticket she could which would take her as far away from there as she could manage...

* * *

Last chapter, back in the present with Priestly, coming soon :)


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Tish remembered the gut-churning, nausea-inducing fear at the unknown, the pain of thinking she was worthless, the effort of building up her walls to protect her emotions and to keep anyone from getting too close. She'd expected loneliness and fear, but look at what she'd gotten instead! Friends who had claimed her as their own, cared so much about her, fought for her, and would do anything to help her and protect her. A husband who had waited for her, had given her time to work through her insecurities even at great heartache to himself, who loved her more than life itself. A husband who would never hurt her, who loved her for who she was, not just what she looked like or could do for him. A husband who showed her what being in love truly felt like, an unconditional love without fear or doubt or hurt. A husband who she loved in return, so much it scared her; she would do anything for him and knew he would do the same for her.

A husband who was waiting patiently outside the door, who she may be starting a family with…

"Tish?" Priestly's tender, slightly hesitant, yet inherently eager, question drifted through the peeling wood.

A soft knock came from the bathroom door, so different from the lonely, dead silence or the violent, angry pounding from her memories. She couldn't help the instinctive flinch though, part of her mind still lingering on the memory of Connor. This couldn't be more different, she reminded herself. Priestly couldn't be more different. She could hear Priestly shuffling in the hallway, his fingers tapping softly on the wall in his nerves. Before long she heard him starting to pace, feet muffled on the carpet, but audible all the same. Three paces, turn, three paces back, up and down along the small hallway.

Twice she'd hoped and prayed for a negative and now she wanted nothing more than for that little positive sign to appear. She wanted this, for herself and for Priestly. She wanted to give Priestly this joy. She wanted to bring a child into their little family, a child who she knew would be loved and cared for. Images of Priestly playing with their child, tucking them in at night, bouncing them on his knee, changing diapers, pulling silly faces at them, trying to make them laugh, flashed before her. Her heart swelled at the thought; he would be a wonderful dad. She'd seen him with Julia, how naturally he spoke to her and interacted with her, how he made her smile, how treated her like an equal and yet encouraged her to still be a child. It was beautiful to see. And now maybe he would have, they would have, a child of their own. It was incredible, awe-inspiring, terrifying…

Gripping the plastic stick in her fingers, Tish crept over to the door and cracked it open, peering into the hallway. Seeing Priestly leaning against the wall, chewing the paint off his nails, she slid around the door, closing the gap between them. She wanted to share this moment with her husband; she didn't want to know one way or another before he did. He was a part of this as much she was and she wanted to share this with him.

"Tish?" he asked, the hope clear in his voice and painfully open expression.

"Haven't got the result yet. Didn't want to do it on my own," she admitted, reaching out a hand to Priestly.

"How long?" he asked as he quickly wrapped her outstretched hand up in his own, pushing off the wall where he leaning as he did so. He smiled down at her, threading his fingers through hers.

Tish shrugged. "About two minutes? Thereabouts."

Priestly nodded, lip caught between his teeth, trying to order his thoughts. When he'd gotten the clamouring under control he noticed how Tish's fingers were trembling minutely in his.

"You're shaking," Priestly softly exclaimed.

"This is kinda big, you know," Tish reminded him wryly.

"I know," Priestly smiled, as he turned, guiding them both through to the living room, settling them both down on the sofa. "But we're gonna be fine. And I'll love you, no matter the result, okay?"

Priestly twisted, so he was facing Tish, wanting to make sure he had her full attention and she understood what he was saying. He tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, skimming his fingers down her cheek as he pulled back. He loved her so so much, and even though it was unexpected, he really did want to have a baby with her, right now, not just years down the line. But he knew his wife and he knew that she'd seen his hopefulness; and he knew that she would blame herself if it was a false alarm and it was negative. He couldn't bear her putting herself through that, not on account of him, so he hastened to reassure her. His worry lessened at her answer however.

"I know, Priestly," she assured, squeezing his hand in hers. "Thank you. And I love you too, you big softie."

Tish leant forward pressing her forehead to his, needing the closeness with her husband. She reached up, sliding her fingers through his double 'hawk. Enjoying the closeness for the moment, the way that Tish's fingers inevitably found their way into his hair, Priestly pulled back slightly, ducking his head slightly to catch her gaze.

"You sure that's all it is? The nerves?" Priestly pressed, the frightened expression on her face when she emerged somewhat warily from the bathroom still etched in his mind. "You looked kinda spooked when you came out into the hall."

Tish smiled sadly, dropping her gaze, fiddling with her wedding ring, twisting it round her finger.

"I was just…remembering some things. Some…not nice things, that's all. Nothing important."

Priestly frowned at that statement; anything that upset Tish was important to him.

"Tish…" he tried.

Before Priestly could push her for answers however, Tish pressed her fingers gently to his lips.

"Later. Not now. I'm fine, I promise," she reassured. "And this is about me and you, and maybe a new family, right? Bad memories don't belong here."

Priestly opened his mouth to argue, but he couldn't see any more of the fear or hurt lingering in his wife's eyes. Just anticipation, excitement, with maybe an edge of nerves, but that was only natural, he conceded. He had his own nerves and excitement swirling in his belly after all. He trusted her and she would tell him when she was ready.

"You're right," he agreed, hooking an arm around her shoulders and drawing her close, giving her a soft squeeze.

He glanced at the clock on the mantle.

"How long now?"

Tish rolled her eyes fondly, completely understanding his excited impatience. "Only about twenty seconds less than when you last asked," she teased.

"Really?" countered her irreverent husband. "Are you sure? I think we need a new clock, because that one's clearly broken."

"Idiot," she smiled, burrowing herself further into his arms, feeling the safety and love that they offered.

* * *

Husband and wife sat on the sofa, wrapped up together, eyed fixed on the innocuous plastic on the table, silently counting as the seconds ticked by. Tish took a deep breath when the allotted time was up. Detangling herself from Priestly, she shuffled towards the edge of the seat, perching on the edge as she reached for the stick which had been resting on a mat of their coffee table.

She felt Priestly shift beside her, joining her on the edge of the cushions, sliding his hand into hers in silent support as she scooped up the test with the other, bringing it into her lap. She still hadn't looked at the plastic. Instead she turned to her husband, lip caught in her teeth, unconsciously mirroring Priestly's earlier action, the nerves now back in full force. The moment when it would all become real…

"Hey," Priestly reassured, "it's gonna be fine."

Tish nodded numbly, eyes wide.

"Now, come on," Priestly urged, practically whining, giving her shoulder a nudge. "You know I have no patience. None at all. You're killing me right now!"

The teasing worked, Tish's body relaxing slightly, a ghost of a smile flickering on her face. Taking a steadying breath, Tish lifted the test up between them, so they could both see. Priestly guided her hand a little closer, so the small symbol was clear. Tish's grip on his hand was bruising.

"Tish…" he gasped, taking in the little pink sign, turning to her in disbelief.

"I… I…" Tish began, not sure what to say, what to think. "It's positive! I'm… I'm really pregnant."

Priestly took in her stunned face, seeing the happiness there despite the overwhelming shock, feeling his own wide grin stretch across his face.

"You're pregnant," he confirmed, wonder lacing every syllable, fighting the urge to dance around and yell for joy, giving Tish a moment to adjust to the life-changing revelation.

"We're going to have a baby," Tish whispered, the shock clear as her voice shook.

Tish glanced down at her stomach, bringing their joined hands to fold over her middle, smiling at the image.

"We're going to have a baby!" she cried happily, launching herself into her husband's lap, wrapping her arms around his neck.

Catching her, burying his face in her neck, breathing in her scent, Priestly laughed as he hugged her in return, one hand wrapped around her back, the other tangled in her hair, cradling the back of her head. He wasn't sure if the wracks that shuddered through Tish's body were laughter or sobs but he knew that it was an overwhelming happy emotion nonetheless.

Suddenly Tish flew from his hold, springing up to standing, face alight, hands held by her face, holding her cheeks.

"We're going to be parents!" she squealed, practically bouncing where she stood, hair flying, tumbling around her shoulders.

Priestly chuckled, drinking in every second of his wife's clear delight.

"Yes, we are!" Priestly agreed, standing up himself, scooping Tish into his arms, lifting her off her feet and twirling her around.

Tish's cries of laughter as she buried her face in his shoulder, legs hooking round his waist to make herself more secure as the room spun around her, was music to Priestly's ears.

Getting dizzy, Priestly gently let her down, sinking onto the edge of the sofa once more, grasping both of Tish's hands in his, pulling her so she was standing between his legs. Priestly looked up at his wife, stunned at how beautiful she was, flushed cheeks framed by her dishevelled, tumbling hair, wide smile, bright eyes. He swallowed as his emotions threatened to overtake him. His wife, his perfect, gorgeous, loving wife, was making him the luckiest guy in the world, all over again; she was making him a father.

He slowly dropped his gaze, until his focus rested on her mid-section. Glancing back up at Tish's smiling face, he hesitantly reached out, one hand gripping her waist. He tenderly slid his other hand under her top, letting his palm rest on her stomach. There was a little life in there, he marvelled, catching his wife's gaze once more, tears shining in his wide eyes, wonder and awe etched into every feature.

Tish breath caught as she blinked back her own tears of joy, feeling the heat of Priestly's palm warm her skin, his thumb stroking softly beside her naval. With the utmost care, Tish felt Priestly move his fingers away to the side, until he was bracketing her slender waist with both his hands, his hand-span practically encircling her, safe and protected. Leaning forward he pressed a gentle, feather-light kiss on her skin, causing Tish to shiver, a thrill sparking through her from where Priestly's lips had touched her. He dropped his forehead to her, gently resting against her abdomen, his warm breath tickling her skin, a cool dampness as Priestly's tears escaped from his eyes. She felt the soft scratch of his gelled, spiked hair over her rib cage, and she smiled. Tish felt as if she was nearly drowning in her joy, bringing her hands up to cradle his head to her as he clung to her, fingers gently scratching at his scalp.

"You're amazing," Priestly whispered, snaking his arms around her lower back, hugging her to him, his cheek pressed against the delicate skin of her stomach before pulling back to meet her gaze, wanting her to see just how much she meant to him.

Tish swallowed, reaching out to dry the happy tears on Priestly's face. Her voice lost as she basked in the knowledge that she'd made Priestly this happy, that she was going to be a mother, that her husband could look at her with such awe and adoration. Clearing her throat quietly, so her voice wouldn't crack and betray how overwhelmed she felt, Tish smiled, pure and bright.

"You're not so bad yourself," she complimented, pushing her husband back onto the sofa, smoothing down her top, her own fingers lingering on the precious life growing inside of her, before settling down beside him, shuffling around to find the most comfortable position.

All of a sudden a thought occurred to her. She pushed herself back away from Priestly, her hand planted firmly on his chest, keeping him away. She frowned, mock-anger on her face.

"What?" Priestly asked, confused by the sudden turn of events, a crease marring the smooth skin between his eyebrows.

"You do realise, then, that me throwing up for the past week is actually, technically, all your fault!" Tish griped, pouting for good measure.

"I… Sorry, I guess?" Priestly tried.

"And you do realise every little ache and pain is going to be your fault for the next nine months, and probably for a few months after too," Tish teased in warning, tongue caught in between her teeth, eyes twinkling.

Tish giggled at Priestly's stunned expression, waiting until it morphed into his devil-may-care twinkle.

"Nuh uh, I didn't sign up for that!" Priestly teased, shaking his head to emphasise his point. "I'm moving to Alaska. Call me when the munchkin's born."

"Nice try, dumbass," Tish joked with a laugh.

Tish pulled her husband close, feeling his hands clasp at her lower back, as she looked up at him. She leant into his hold, trusting him to keep her safe. She reached up to trace his cheek, fingers smoothing over the soft, freckled skin, feeling the rough hair of his side burns tickle her fingertips.

"You know I love you, right? And I always will?"

"Positive," Priestly answered with a smile, as Tish groaned at his cringe-worthy pun, dropping her head against his chest in despair at his humour.

"You're such a dork!"

Priestly stuck his tongue out at her, in the only possible response to such a statement. Grinning unashamedly at her, Priestly wrapped his beloved wife in his arms, tight against him, and kissed her with all the love in his heart. It wasn't going to be easy, in fact as the news began to sink in he was downright terrified, but at the same time he couldn't be more excited to be starting a family with Tish and face all the challenges it brought, together.

* * *

The End

* * *

Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed! Reviews are, as always, very much appreciated :)


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